I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
He passed out mid-signature
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
