your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize