i barfeds in our rink
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
My feet surprised me
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
