He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Sext me about skeletons
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize