either way he was missing a nipple.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
