At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
now i know why i became what i already was.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize
