i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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