I seem to have left my pride at pride
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
