She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Oh god it's open bar.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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