How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize