their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
