Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize