My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
