operation harelip BJ is a go
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize
