the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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