Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
