peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
