He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
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