found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
