oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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