last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
