Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
