we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
