things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
