he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize