i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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