How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
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