All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Randomize
