She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
and she was petting her beer can
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize