I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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