I'm eating all of the evidence.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize