We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Randomize