I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
