her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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