they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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