So drunk, too bad you don't want this
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
