My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
