i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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