im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
