So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
