is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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