How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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