i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I think your dad took our porno
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I love you.
Bad choice
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize