Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
