Walk of Shame. In a state park.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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