I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
