Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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