so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
