no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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