she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
