Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
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