And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
