Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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